RUNNING ON EMPTY
Have you ever felt the need to step back and recharge, or take a moment to remind yourself why you're pushing so hard to achieve your goals?
So did the main character in this story, which was an 8 year old boy. The world came to a pause one day when he found his tank was running on empty.
I saw this story and my heart felt it so I wanted to share with you.
The boys were already seated at their desks, ready for the school day, and I was about to leave for work when I noticed my youngest standing in the bathroom, wiping his face. I paused at the door and asked if he was okay. He looked up, tears silently streaming down his face, and shook his head. When I asked if something had happened, he shook his head again.
So, I sat on the edge of the tub and pulled him onto my lap. I told him that sometimes our hearts feel empty and need to be refilled. He cried into my chest, and I held him close.
I asked if he could feel my love filling him up. He nodded, and the tears began to slow.
I waited for a moment.
“Has it reached your toes yet?” I asked.
He shook his head no.
“Alright, buddy. We’ll take as long as you need. Work doesn't matter right now. School isn't important either. This, right here, is the most important thing today, okay? Filling you back up to the top. Is that good?”
He nods.
Another minute passes.
“Is your heart full of Mama's love now?”
“Yeah…”
I looked into his eyes and saw the brightness return. He was full to the top, and he was smiling.
Friends, whether you’re 8, 28, 38, 48, or older, we all run on empty at times, just like he did. His weekend had been so busy and full that his little soul had run dry!
Have you felt that way before and sometimes more often than not? I know I have and I sometimes wonder, can it be refilled? The answer is a definite YES!! We all have our own beliefs and methods of trying to recharge and FILL OUR TANK, but I can’t think of a better way than to fill it with LOVE!!
Take a moment to reach out to those you deeply care about and let them know how much you love them - IT ALWAYS COMES BACK. It brings a smile to our faces to brighten someones day, then guess what???, our tank just got a little less empty.
No one loved or loves us more than our Father in Heaven and His Son, so focus on His love by scripture, prayer, worship, praises, laughter, friends, hugs. For it all comes from Him.
If you don’t refill your emptiness/tank then you will find those emotions—tears, anger, sharp words—overflowing for no apparent reason.
Take a moment to refill your tank and in turn you might help fill someone else’s.
2 Thessalonians 3:5
May the Lord fill your hearts with God’s love. May Christ give you the strength to go on.
Understanding the Marvel of the Human Brain
June is Brain Awareness Month, a time dedicated to increasing public awareness about the wonders of the human brain and the importance of brain health.
The human brain is one of the most complex and fascinating organs in the body. It weighs about three pounds but contains approximately 86 billion neurons, each connected by synapses that create an intricate network for transmitting information. This powerful organ controls everything we do, from simple reflexes to complex thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
Key Functions of the Brain:
Cognition and Thought: The brain enables us to think, reason, and solve problems. It's the center of our intelligence and decision-making processes.
Memory: The brain stores and retrieves memories, which shape our experiences and identity.
Emotion Regulation: The brain processes and regulates emotions, influencing our mood and social interactions.
Movement: The brain coordinates voluntary and involuntary movements, from walking to the beating of the heart.
Sensory Processing: The brain interprets sensory information from the environment, allowing us to see, hear, smell, taste, and touch.
Maintaining brain health is crucial for overall well-being. Here are some tips to keep your brain in top shape:
Stay Physically Active: Regular exercise improves blood flow to the brain and encourages the growth of new neurons.
Eat a Balanced Diet: Foods rich in antioxidants, good fats, vitamins, and minerals provide the brain with the nutrients it needs to function optimally.
Get Adequate Sleep: Sleep is essential for memory consolidation and the removal of toxins from the brain.
Stay Mentally Active: Engage in activities that challenge your brain, such as puzzles, reading, and learning new skills.
Socialize: Social interactions stimulate the brain and can help ward off depression and stress.
Brain Awareness Month also emphasizes the importance of understanding and addressing brain disorders, which can affect anyone. These include:
Alzheimer's Disease: A progressive neurodegenerative disorder that leads to memory loss and cognitive decline.
Parkinson's Disease: A condition characterized by tremors, stiffness, and difficulty with balance and coordination.
Stroke: A medical emergency where blood flow to the brain is interrupted, causing brain cells to die.
Mental Health Disorders: Conditions such as depression, anxiety, and schizophrenia, which impact millions of people worldwide.
Brain Awareness Month is a valuable opportunity to celebrate the brain's incredible capabilities and emphasize the importance of brain health. By staying informed and proactive, we can support our own brain health and contribute to the broader understanding of this remarkable organ. Whether through education, research, or personal health practices, everyone has a role to play in fostering a brain-healthy society.
For further information or resource you can contact:
RESOURCE WELLNESS CENTRE/ ABILENE BRAIN CENTER
7102 S. Clack Street, Suite 3
Abilene, TX 79605
(325) 269-0250
Managing Your Focus
The way you manage your focus can impact how effectively you navigate the challenges or changes in your life. Recognizing if your focus has shifted is a first step; the next is actively deciding how to realign your focus in ways that serve your well-being, personal goals and your business goals. Managing your focus involves mindfulness about where your attention goes, setting boundaries, prioritizing tasks, and sometimes seeking support from others to help maintain or regain a balanced perspective.
Situations can significantly alter your focus because they might trigger emotional responses, shift your priorities, or present new information that requires attention.
Illness, death, loss of a job, or sometimes just the day to day grind of trying to get ahead. Staying positive is sometimes so difficult, but just know that you truly are not along in this. We all, at times, have to realign our focus on the positive or even to a new goal/direction.
Here are a few suggestions that might help and can be transformative, especially in today’s fast-paced and often unpredictable environment. To further enhance these strategies, here are some additional tips that can help someone stay focused and aligned with their goals:
1. Reflection: Periodically reflect on your progress and the hurdles you've overcome. This can reinforce a sense of accomplishment and help maintain a positive trajectory.
2. Positive Affirmations: Repeating positive affirmations daily can help reinforce a positive mindset and build resilience against negativity.
3. Gratitude Practice: Each day, try to write down or think about things you’re grateful for. This can shift your focus from what's wrong to what's right.
4. Set Clear Goals: Having clear, achievable goals provides direction and motivation, which can help you stay focused on your progress rather than getting distracted by negativity.
5. Break Down Larger Goals: Sometimes, large goals can seem daunting and may cause procrastination or overwhelm. Breaking these down into smaller, manageable tasks can make them seem more achievable and less intimidating. This step-by-step approach can keep motivation high and provide frequent moments of accomplishment.
6. Mindfulness and Meditation: Regular practice of mindfulness or meditation can greatly improve one's ability to concentrate and stay calm under pressure. These practices help in managing stress and improving overall mental clarity, which is crucial when focusing on goals.
7. Limit Distractions: In a world filled with constant notifications and interruptions, it’s important to create an environment that minimizes distractions. This might involve setting specific times to check emails or social media, using apps that block distracting sites, or organizing your workspace to reduce clutter.
8. Seek Feedback: Regularly seeking feedback can provide new perspectives and insights on your progress. This could come from mentors, peers, or through self-assessment tools. Feedback helps identify areas of improvement and can motivate you to refine your strategies and stay on track.
9. Regular Exercise: Physical activity is not only good for the body but also for the mind. It enhances cognitive function and can improve mood and energy levels, making it easier to maintain focus on daily tasks and long-term goals.
10. Social Support: Don’t underestimate the power of a supportive social network. Surrounding yourself with positive, like-minded individuals can provide encouragement and inspiration. Additionally, sharing your goals with others can create a sense of accountability, which can be a powerful motivator.
Each of the above suggestions can contribute to building a structured approach to maintaining positivity and focus, even when faced with challenges or setbacks.
If you find yourself not being able to have a clear focus on what is important to you, reach out. Reach out to friends, family, or someone you know will shoot it straight with you. Then you can set your focus and start to move those mountains to achieve your goals.
FOCUS ON WHERE YOU WANT TO BE,
NOT WHERE YOU WERE OR WHERE YOU ARE!
Effects of Companionship
Human Beings have a deep-seated need for love and compassion. These are fundamental aspects of human nature that contribute to emotional well-being and social connection. Love and compassion provide individuals with a sense of belonging, support, and understanding, fostering positive relationships and emotional resilience. Research in psychology and neuroscience also suggests that experiences of love and compassion have profound effects on mental and physical health, highlighting their importance in human life. From familial bonds to friendships and romantic relationships, expressions of love and acts of compassion are integral to human existence and fulfillment.
In our industry of assisting aging adults and veterans, we literally witness the effects that usually transform a person's outlook, well-being, and overall better interest in living life!
We have witnessed improved mental health from our CarePros being in the home on a regular basis, and it also seems to reduce their stress.
Studies show that people with social connections tend to have a stronger immune system. The emotional support provided by companionship may bolster the body’s ability to fight off illness and infection.
Social interaction stimulates the brain and can help maintain cognitive function as you age. Engaging in conversation, playing games, and participating in group activities.
This is exactly how Home Instead started in 1994. Paul & Lori Hogan's grandmother was declining, and when the family stepped in and set up schedules for each family member to visit with her grandmother, she thrived for ten more years.
I would have to say the old saying is true: "All they need is a little T.L.C. (tender loving care)," which holds true for a lot of our clients' needs.
So, if you know someone who needs some T.L.C. with an excellent CarePro with training and a passion to assist,
CALL US!
G.R.I.T. Home Care Services, LLC dba Home Instead
(325) 670-9610
Moving Forward
“My current condition is not my conclusion”, quoted from a gentleman that spoke at my rotary club and this quote has stuck with me for quite some time now.
What does that quote bring to your mind? Are you currently in a good place in your life and if so, what would this say to you, how would you translate?
Are your dreams coming to fruition and life is so good that you don’t want to think about your current condition not being your conclusion? But what if the conclusion is better? WOW, right?!!
Or does this quote above bring relief and reassurance because your life right now is not the best? Maybe this says to you that the work you are doing right now to fix whatever is wrong in your life, will pay off and possibly reinspire you to actually work on your “condition”. Hopefully, it will create a desire to dig deeper and strive harder, where your current condition is not your conclusion and you move forward to a better place in your life.
Life is short so if we are not moving forward, we are either stuck in the present or falling behind. Which I would think being stuck, might actually mean that your current condition COULD POSSIBLY BE your conclusion. Would you be happy with that?
We all know that in either case, good or bad, things arise, situations change, so there really is a truth to the quote.
Right now, I am loving my current condition in my job, in my life; spiritually, physically and mentally. I have been married for 41 years so my husband and I have ridden several rollercoasters that come with a marriage lasting this long, and at a point in our lives where no matter the struggles, we don’t fret, we don’t really argue, we just deal. Of course, that wasn’t always the case LOL.
I feel I have a firm relationship with our Savior and I KNOW He guides me, no matter the trials, He walks with me.
On the job front, I can say I absolutely LOVE what I do. It took a long time to get here, but it truly thrills me when I am out educating others on their options as they age and be able to address any need they might have for them to keep their independence. This includes so many resources that we have available to educate them on.
I would love to hear from others, their thoughts, on what comes to mind when they read this quote.
Do you have an idea in mind on what your best conclusion could possibly be? Are you moving forward to that conclusion? If not, why not make a change. I know change is not always easy, but if you aren’t truly happy with your current condition, what is stopping you?
Do you realize that the more you strive to “your idea” on what your best conclusion could be that it will probably turn out to be even better than you imagined? Especially when you have God on your side. Philippians 4:13
I have asked a lot of questions in this blog, but I know it is questions I needed to ask myself and reflect if I am still striving for better.
My hope is that this has inspired even just one to make a move to that conclusion or strive to change the condition you find yourself in if it is not where you want to be.
If you are looking to make a career change or want some assistance in changing your current condition, please consider us here at Home Instead. Let us MOVE FORWARD together!
G.R.I.T. HOME CARE SERVICES dba HOME INSTEAD / 441 Lone Star Drive / Abilene, TX, 79602
(325) 670-9610
Expressing a Thank You not just verbally…
Thanking our Veterans should be something that comes to us naturally for all they have done for this country and ensuring our freedom.
However, we don’t always recognize when our Veterans have needs of their own. In speaking with some of our Veterans that have come out of war time I have learned that there are occasions where there is physical or mental challenge that is not always seen and they are not sure where to turn to for assistance. Also, not all challenges in day to day living are easily explained or understood, but how could we not do our best to understand and assist with what they have done for us and our country.
Some have sacrificed more than others, but the fact that they stepped up to the plate to serve, no matter the length of time, is more than I myself have done. I, for one, am appreciative and want to find a way to show that appreciation other than “Thank You for your service”. I want them to feel the appreciation.
Now that Home Instead Abilene is a community provider with Veteran Affairs to provide home care services for veterans in Texas (and that includes all of our 14 counties), I have come to realize how many veterans and veteran spouses do not know about benefits available. Not just for home care services, but for other assistances as well.
So in wanting to assist our veterans I did a little research and contacted several agencies in the counties we serve, so if you don’t find the information you need in one of the websites listed below, please don’t hesitate to reach out and see how we might be of assistance. (325) 670-0610
For those that have served or are serving our country, along with their spouses that have stood by them, Home Instead would like to say THANK YOU once again and please know how much we appreciate your service for our freedom.
Take a look at the websites listed and I hope this helps you navigate a little smoother when looking for the assistance you might need.
www.taylorcounty.texas.gov/197/Veterans-Services
www.browncountywi.gov/departments/veterans-services/general-information/
https://nrd.gov/resource/detail/13780847/Eastland+County+Veteran%27s+Services+Office+-+Texas
www.va.gov/abilene-vet-center/
www.americanveteransaid.com
www.va.gov/west-texas-health-care/locations/abilene-va-clinic/
Show Me The Money
What?
You would think that you have earned the right to live comfortably in your aging years so you could just enjoy life. However, it's not that easy and so many really don’t have that opportunity.
Retirement must be planned for, but so should unexpected limitations that might not have been taken into consideration. Some of those considerations are health concerns, possible rehab or continued assistance needed to live your daily life the way you want to live it.
The costs for such assistance are more than most people plan for, thought about or have expected. Approximately 40% of adults 65+ need daily assistance and 70% of adults 65+ will need assistance at some point in their lives.
We are not talking about medical assistance, we are talking about assistance needed for personal care, transportation, companionship, and sometimes specialized services for dementia or Alzheimer’s. These types of assistance, however, are just not covered by normal medical insurance. Only if you have a long-term care policy or have Veteran's benefits will insurance cover in-home care services.
There are other ways as well that you can plan for these instances and may need some financial investment planning help unless that is your specialty.
Some Cost examples:
In-Home $4,957.00/month
Home Health $5,148.00/month -often requires written doctor's order for insurance coverage
Assisted Living $4300.00/month
Residential Skilled Nursing Care $7,908.00/month for a shared room, $9,034.00/month for a private room
Financial Planning ways to be able to cover those costs:
LTC Insurance
-high premiums
-coverage varies by policy
-most require assistance with 2 ADLs before payment of Assisted Living Services
-often max age for sign up
Reverse Mortgage
-loan taken against value of home
-convert home equity into liquid funds
-needs to be repaid w/interest within a certain timeframe from the homeowner's move to an assisted living community
Life Insurance
-Cash out existing policy and use for LTC
-Some policies feature accelerated death benefit (ADB)
• allows the policy holder to get a tax-free advance on insurance benefit while still alive
• ADB usually 2-3% of total benefit amount
Life Settlement
- Life insurance policy holders sell their policy to a 3rd party company. A 3rd party buyer will then pay you a lump sum. This amount is not as large as the full policy death benefit.
Through tons of research, it is said that by the year 2050, the ratio of family members to provide caregiver support for their loved ones will drop to less than 3:1. Currently, we are standing at about 7:1 and by 2030 we will be close to 4:1. Additionally, on average, one or more adult children live more than 280 miles away so it is not an easy fix for them to be able to be the caregiver for their family member.
9/10 Americans ages 65 and older want to stay at home as long as possible. Seniors and their families are willing to pay their own way with money they have saved.
• Based on research, elderly Americans receiving in-home care needed fewer trips to the doctor. Doctor's visits were reduced by 25%.
• The U.S. saved as much as $25B in hospital costs in 2008 due to the growth of in-home care services over the previous decade.
• Delays premature entry into assisted living facilities and nursing homes
• In-home care allows for respite for family members caring for their loved ones
I hope we have achieved our goal of providing a little in-depth information on how planning for just daily living in our later years needs to be a priority. We all like to think that we will never need such care, unfortunately that is not always the case.
So just know that there is assistance available to keep living your life to the fullest, whether you are planning for it just in case, or you are in the throws of it. We are here to help.
RESOURCES FOR FINANCIAL INFORMATION & HOME CARE SERVICES:
LPL Financial / Josh Fleming / 402 Cypress #305 / Abilene, TX 79601 / (325) 673-0185
www.lplabilene.com
Home Instead / 441 Lone Star Drive / Abilene, TX 79602 / (325) 670-9610
www.homeinstead.com/234
Activity as we age - Mental & Physical
A chicken walks into the room . . . yep, you guessed it, it’s a JOKE. When you hear those first few words, your brain springs into action. The transmission of nerve impulses is a complex one that enlists various brain regions: the frontal lobe, to process the information; the supplementary motor area, to tap learned experience to direct motor activities such as the movements associated with laughter; and the nucleus accumbens, to assess the pleasure of the story and the reward that the “aha!” brings. When the punch line hits home, your heart rate rises, you jiggle with mirth, and your brain releases “feel good” neurotransmitters: dopamine, serotonin, and an array of endorphins.
Jokes work because they defy expectations. After all the neurotransmitters are released and the information remains relevant through the punch line of the joke, the brain shifts its response to its pleasure-and-reward center, which in turn triggers hearty laughter. A hearty laugh of about 20 minutes is said to be as good as an aerobic exercise of 60 minutes. WOW - ok folks start laughing!!
Doctors tell you that exercise is good for your health and depending on capability, age, and other factors, what type of exercise is determined.
Also there is a saying that laughter (now determined an activity) is the best medicine. This was derived from Proverbs 17:22 KJV A merry heart doeth good like a medicine….
“I completed 2500 steps.” Yes, I know that is beyond minimal, but for my height of 5’3” that is a little more than a mile. At age 64 I consider that success!
As we age our physical activity dwindles a little for most, but doing what you can with others can also make it fun. There are so many ways to get in some physical activity, besides just working out.
There is a great place in Abilene, Texas for Seniors to get in a little exercise (mental & physical) of their choice; walking, stretching, line dancing, games and more. ROSE PARK SENIOR ACTIVITY CENTER / 2625 South 7th Street! Also, you get in a lot of interaction with your peers that just makes it all fun.
https://www.abilenetx.gov/Seniors
You never know, but maybe you will get in a little of the best exercise and the best medicine all in one place -
A GUFFAW!
Wading in the Water
There were times as a child I remember having no inhibitions or even too much fear because, I guess until I got really hurt for the first time, I didn’t know what physical pain or emotional pain felt like, so I just dove into what I was doing.
Of course, as I got older, that definitely changed, and I started limiting myself to safer choices to some extent. This also influenced how I lived my life and the people I chose to hang around with, the things I experienced. Now don’t get me wrong; wise, moral, and safe choices are good, very good, but on some things how do we know that it wouldn’t be a wonderful experience if we just dove in?!
Yes, common sense is to be used, sometimes research is wise and knowing the situation & people we are about to do these things with, which also comes into play. What about those things we know won’t hurt ourselves or anybody else and it takes giving ourselves freedom to do these things.
Have you figured out yet some of these things I might be talking about? Some might take a little effort, a little time and sometimes a little planning - yes, away from what you feel is important!!
Smile at a stranger, have a chat in the grocery line, remember a loved one with a call or a text or WOW, even a visit. These things might not make your day, but it will feel good when you make somebody else’s.
NOW, here is the part where it might take a little more effort and convincing - TIME FOR YOURSELF. Even if it is just 15 to 30 minutes a week - I promise it will make your soul sing. That thing that always made you stop, smile, sing, dance and let loose.
Sometimes I roll down my window (even in 50-to-60-degree weather, turn on my heater) in the car and turn up my music loud and sing at the top of my lungs.
“Letting go” for ourselves seems to have gotten so hard when we are workaholics or feel guilty that we are not doing something productive. Believe me, this is productive. This keeps you from snarling at your co-workers or significant other, or even feeling even like you have accomplished nothing while still working all day. This is feeding your heart & soul, which in turn you use to feed others.
I used to love finding water (pond, lake or even just a big puddle) and taking off my shoes, rolling up my pants leg and wading through the water. Guess what I am going to do after writing this blog….yep.
Take time for yourself in letting go - not being pampered by others, but pampering yourself by getting back to those things you loved doing as a child when you had no fear!!
Wade in the water and refresh your soul.
Email me your thoughts & stories or just leave me a comment on this one. Would love to hear from you:
Thoughts…Habits…Outlook
Yes, this is a subject I’m sure we all struggle with from time to time and not just me.
Sometimes I find myself dwelling on negative things and thoughts after a few difficult days and some rejections. So all the more reason that I am thankful for those in my life that recognize this about me and have found a way of waking me up and being straight with me and guiding me out of it.
For example, they let me vent (just once - not continually) and really hear what I am saying, then they throw a few questions my way; ‘so the reason for the difficult days was…….and the thing you could have done to make them better or at least less difficult is…..’
Hmmmm, ok now I have to think about that. Sometimes there are specific things that I could have done and sometimes, unfortunately, there are none.
‘Ok, so on those where you could have done something, do you see this situation possibly happening again? And those solutions that you just thought of, do you see yourself doing them?’ WOOHOO, problem solved. Then the laughter begins because we both realize sometimes it is just not that easy, but it has brought about a different perspective on what “I saw” as a difficult day and as a rejection.
Slowly but surely, I am learning that it is truly about your own perspective on things; your thoughts that lead to habits that then lead to your outlook. For those that want you to see it from their perspective and not your own, especially if it is negative and they want to LIVE there; I would say avoid if you can’t change their outlook and continue to work on your own.
Don’t get me wrong, it never hurts to see things from several different perspectives, but how it impacts your daily life and those around you, take it all in, (and as my dad always tried to teach me) analyze it and if you can do something about it - DO IT and if you can’t - MOVE ON.
I am so very thankful for family and friends that care enough to shoot it straight with me to help me see the best in life and I pray that I can do the same for them and others.
Not all have this and so I have investigated some ways that, until you find “those few” who can do that for you; here are a few habits maybe you can make for yourself when those times arise:
*Keep a journal of those times that you see as negative/difficult days and rejections (because later you will see them differently = 90%)
*Now ask yourself the questions - could I have guided a different outcome and if so, write down how (you seem to remember it that way so it will come to you if that situation comes around again)
*Take yourself out of the situation if possible and to a place that makes you happy
*THIS IS One of my Two Favorites; Practice (yes in the mirror because you will remember these times and smile) laughing at yourself - SERIOUSLY
*2nd of my Two Favorites; If you pray, I highly suggest doing this, or some exercise or form of meditation
*Find someone to bounce things off or vent that will not let you stay there
Positive thoughts lead to positive habits which in turn lead to a positive outlook and these people are AMAZING to be around.
Let’s all try to be one of those amazing people and change this world we are living in!
Thank you for reading and feel free to leave comments and I welcome your thoughts.
If you have a resource that needs to be known to others, please send me their information because I really want for us to educate each other on all options available for whatever your need might be.
julieblair@homeinstead.com
Not my rock, not my Dad..
Bone Cancer, really??
The shoulders I leaned on, the words of advice I counted on, what was I going to do?
I’m ashamed of my immediate thoughts, selfish and impassionate is how it sounds to me now. But you must understand, my father hung the moon in this youngest daughter of 4 girls’ heart and head. I did everything with my father; fished, built additions on to our 2-bedroom house while we lived in it with 4 girls sharing one-bedroom, roofed Mom’s dress shop we built, discussed the storms while out on the porch as he explained the different types of clouds and what they meant, and I LOVED IT and hung on every word.
This was my daddy, and I was the one helping him with his projects when all the while I was learning more than I ever could have ever helped him.
The uncertainty of what was coming, how to fight it, could we fight it, where to find the answers. I was taught to sit back and analyze the situation and then fix it or walk away. In this situation I couldn’t do either of those things, so the feeling of helplessness was overwhelming. I wanted to help my Dad with the fight, console my Mom that all would be ok even though I didn’t know and all the while I wanted to go to sleep and wake up because this was a dream. It had to be.
You live your life knowing that diseases, accidents, tragedy strikes daily, but always thinking it happens to others, not you. Or praying and hoping that is the case and until it hits home, you never know how you will truly react.
I went off alone and had my “why MY dad” and gut-wrenching cry and then prayed.
OK, so now it was my turn, to be the shoulders, to do the things he taught me so well how to do and doing my best to not make it any big deal while it was heartbreaking for him, my mom and myself.
Could I do it? Could I be strong enough and not break down in front of Mom & Dad? Could I work full time and still give quality time to my husband, two kids and then to Mom & Dad? Where could I seek help? Would they accept help? Would I? I mean this was MY DADDY!!
Family and Friends are a must in any such case, but professional help and support who deal with these things on a daily basis is also a must.
I hope in some way this has touched your heart, to either be that family member, friend, or source to assist those that have been affected by cancer or any other devastating disease.
If you are need of more information, please reach out to:
CANCER SERVICES NETWORK | 1218 NORTH 4th, SUITE 213 | ABILENE, TX 79601 | 325-672-0040
Cancer Services Network’s mission is to provide help and hope to local cancer patients, cancer, their families and caregivers through direct financial, emotional, spiritual, and social programs and services.
Living in a Chaotic World..
“Mom, I found toilet paper under the cushion in the rocking chair. What is that about? “ My mom looked at me confused and proceeded to make excuses, so I wasn’t sure what to think, but we went on with our day since I had driven in to visit with her.
After that, phone calls seemed a little strange, and Mom had got good at averting certain subjects and making excuses to get off the phone. This situation was out of the norm for Mom because we were very close. I was starting to get my feelings hurt, so I scheduled another visit a little sooner to figure out why the phone conversations had changed.
On this visit, I noticed a few more things in strange areas, and the conversation was even a little vaguer. Mom kept telling me how much she loved me, not just a few times, but much more than usual. My mother was extremely compassionate and loving and, as an older adult now, talked about nearly everything. Not too many secrets between us, so I knew she was trying to hide something (other than the stuff I found in random places).
Now was when I knew things weren’t quite right. Not only did I realize mom was evasive but needed clarification about what little communication I was getting from her.
So not only was I trying to comfort and communicate with Mom, but dealing with the confusion I was going through during this situation I found us in. Where do I go for answers? What do I even ask? Do I approach the changes in Mom with her even more profoundly than what I had already done because it frustrated and upset her when I did?
To know my mom was to know what unconditional love felt like, and this is no exaggeration. If I could only be ½ the woman my mother was, I would consider myself blessed.
Seeing her confused, frustrated, and avoiding me (baby girl of 4 daughters) was killing me inside – I wanted to help her, and I did not know how!
My older sister and I spoke and decided that Mom did not need to live alone any longer. My Dad, her husband of 50 years, had been gone for ten years. Mom lived in an independent community and would go around helping the other residents with groceries or anything she could and loved visiting with them all. We had been made aware that this had not been the case for a few months.
And here, our journey began looking for a more secure living facility because I couldn't afford to quit work and stay home with Mom no matter how much I wanted to. So much I didn't know, like options, choices, or where to turn, and as some of you probably know, when you are amid a journey such as ours, if you aren’t already aware of the options for diseases such as this, they don’t naturally come to mind on how to maneuver through. You are just trying your best to make it through each day and be the strength your loved one needs without falling apart yourself.
In short, this chaotic journey with my wonderful mother through Alzheimer's enlightened me on many things I wish I had been aware of before I traveled.
You feel helpless while missing a loved one you know that doesn't seem to be there any longer, but they are! Alzheimer's, in my eyes, is an aggressive disease for all that encounter it.
If nothing else, I learned no matter how confused, frustrated, and in denial an Alzheimer's loved one is, they know the love. The feeling that they are supposed to know you and that they love you even when they can’t remember your face or your name.
God guided me through this journey with my mother to learn things I can now share with others.
Hence this blog post.
I now work for Home Instead to assist aging adults in living their life to the best of their ability, with compassion and trust in the Lord, as I did with my mother.
Please reach out if you find yourself, a loved one, or a friend living in a chaotic world and walking a journey as I did. Not only myself but the owners of Home Instead and my co-workers are here to assist with any questions you might have.
For more information on Dementia and Alzheimer’s and more compassionate ears with resources in abundance, please reach out to:
Kristin Bishop / Mindy Bannister
Alzheimer’s Association
(325) 672-2907
It all started with a dream..
G.R.I.T. Home Care Services, LLC started with a dream….
Acacia Abshire began her journey with Home Instead in 2015 as a Recruitment and Engagement Coordinator, and she soon discovered that keeping our loved ones at home was her passion. Acacia sought every opportunity to learn the business, how the company operated, and how each role functioned within the organization. Acacia spent five years locally, expanding on her knowledge and experience. In 2020 she was offered an opportunity to expand on these attributes at the Corporate Office in Omaha, Nebraska. During her time with the Corporate Office, she coached pre-existing franchises and assisted with the start-up of new franchises. While she enjoyed contributing to and developing various franchises across the United States, she dreamed of owning and operating her own Home Instead Franchise in Abilene.
Acacia's husband, Jason Abshire, also has a deep passion for increased quality of life for our loved ones and the value-added toward quality of life when allowed to age in place. Jason received his Bachelor of Science in nursing from Texas Tech University Health Science Center. He is working toward his Master of Science in Healthcare Administration from Texas Tech University Health Science Center School of Health Professions. Jason and Acacia's long-term goals quickly aligned, and their passion and determination soon became a reality. On September 16th, 2022, Acacia became the owner and Chief Executive Officer of G.R.I.T. Home Care Service L.L.C., doing business as Home Instead. Jason and Acacia's journey has just begun, and they are excited to serve their community's seniors.