Thoughts…Habits…Outlook
Yes, this is a subject I’m sure we all struggle with from time to time and not just me.
Sometimes I find myself dwelling on negative things and thoughts after a few difficult days and some rejections. So all the more reason that I am thankful for those in my life that recognize this about me and have found a way of waking me up and being straight with me and guiding me out of it.
For example, they let me vent (just once - not continually) and really hear what I am saying, then they throw a few questions my way; ‘so the reason for the difficult days was…….and the thing you could have done to make them better or at least less difficult is…..’
Hmmmm, ok now I have to think about that. Sometimes there are specific things that I could have done and sometimes, unfortunately, there are none.
‘Ok, so on those where you could have done something, do you see this situation possibly happening again? And those solutions that you just thought of, do you see yourself doing them?’ WOOHOO, problem solved. Then the laughter begins because we both realize sometimes it is just not that easy, but it has brought about a different perspective on what “I saw” as a difficult day and as a rejection.
Slowly but surely, I am learning that it is truly about your own perspective on things; your thoughts that lead to habits that then lead to your outlook. For those that want you to see it from their perspective and not your own, especially if it is negative and they want to LIVE there; I would say avoid if you can’t change their outlook and continue to work on your own.
Don’t get me wrong, it never hurts to see things from several different perspectives, but how it impacts your daily life and those around you, take it all in, (and as my dad always tried to teach me) analyze it and if you can do something about it - DO IT and if you can’t - MOVE ON.
I am so very thankful for family and friends that care enough to shoot it straight with me to help me see the best in life and I pray that I can do the same for them and others.
Not all have this and so I have investigated some ways that, until you find “those few” who can do that for you; here are a few habits maybe you can make for yourself when those times arise:
*Keep a journal of those times that you see as negative/difficult days and rejections (because later you will see them differently = 90%)
*Now ask yourself the questions - could I have guided a different outcome and if so, write down how (you seem to remember it that way so it will come to you if that situation comes around again)
*Take yourself out of the situation if possible and to a place that makes you happy
*THIS IS One of my Two Favorites; Practice (yes in the mirror because you will remember these times and smile) laughing at yourself - SERIOUSLY
*2nd of my Two Favorites; If you pray, I highly suggest doing this, or some exercise or form of meditation
*Find someone to bounce things off or vent that will not let you stay there
Positive thoughts lead to positive habits which in turn lead to a positive outlook and these people are AMAZING to be around.
Let’s all try to be one of those amazing people and change this world we are living in!
Thank you for reading and feel free to leave comments and I welcome your thoughts.
If you have a resource that needs to be known to others, please send me their information because I really want for us to educate each other on all options available for whatever your need might be.
julieblair@homeinstead.com